This is the account of Rachel’s death. Rachel was the wife of Israel’s (or Jacob), and in my opinion, is the Bible’s most romantic story… well, until it gets all twisted later. Anyways, Rachel died giving birth to Benoni/Benjamin. In my bible, there’s a footnote next to the name she gave him, Benoni, which means “son of my sorrow” or “son of my strength”. I think it’s interesting that the same name has, what seems like, two very different meanings. But the more I think about, the more it makes sense.

Rachel undoubtly loves her son, like any mother would/does. She died painfully giving birth to this kid, and so it makes sense that he’s the son of her sorrow. But her love for him, must have played some roll in her perseverence through labor.

While i don’t think this love/hate relationship is necessary for all things, it may be a good indicator. I think i can love something without being hurt by it (ex my ps3) or be hurt by something you don’t love (poisonous frogs), but i’m just saying, the relationship is common and is there. Not only is it there, but maybe the hurt, the cost, makes your love even better, deeper. I’m a little nastolgic/attached when it comes to my car. It’s not a cool car, very common actually. And even though I absolutely hate when I have to drop money to maintain it, i still feel a lil more attached to it b/c i did. “Pappa just 1k on new breaks and rotors for u baby, b/c that’s right, pappa loves u.” Someone once said u cant have the sweet w/o the sour. And CS Lewis once something like “the question isn’t why do good pious humble christians suffer, the question is, if you are such a good pious humble christian, why aren’t you suffering?” Maybe, maybe, if i had the right perspective, if i was truly inline, my suffering for God would only make my love for him deeper. Maybe it does, and i just don’t see it yet.

Benoni, son of my sorrow, son of my strength. True story.

2 things:

1. I thought that it was interesting that God experienced regret (vs 5-7). It says that he’s “sorry” twice, and one of the times he’s actually saying it. I kno I do things I regret……all of the time…. everyday…. in fact, now that i think about it, my life sucks. I even regret things other than sin. ex: the day after Thanksgiving, i slowly scraped the side of my car against a pole while parking, my friends laughed/called me an idiot, i swore in my head, then i reversed into a dumpster, all in about 5 seconds. BUT, I dunno… i guess, it happens to everybody? Even……God? What God regrets isn’t a sin (he doesn’t sin), but it’s not exactly a small thing either. Regretting the creation of man is a slightly bigger deal than that time he made a joke and nobody laughed…. (awkward!), ha jk. The only reason i can think of now for putting that he regrets his creation, is that it makes his story about Noah better.
2. Noah must have been lonely. For some reason, i have this soft spot in my heart for people who do the right thing and have to suffer the consequences of loneliness. How admirable.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nephilim

There’s wikipedia’s description of Nehpilim. My Bible has a footnote next to it that says “or giants”. Wikipedia says that Goliath might have been a Nephilim. Just thought that was kinda cool is all.

I know now through science that the earth is not the center of the universe. But here, it says that God first made the earth (and heavens) and then the stars after. I think it’s interesting that he didn’t make earth the largest planet in the universe or the coldest/hotest or fastest/slowest or even the center of the universe; but my guess is that it’s still the planet that he cares about most deeply.

My life probably isn’t the most important in this world/country/state/city/zip-code. And my duties, feelings, tasks in my not-most-important life probably aren’t even the most important things on any given day. There are things in my life that are bigger than me (ie: my sister’s wedding, the Cubs season, the company I’m “running”, etc.,) and it ought to be that way. But just b/c i’m not the most prevalant thing in my world, might not mean that even the small “mundane” matters of my life: how i feel today or what tasks are ahead of me, mean any less to him. The earth isn’t the most anything the universe, but he watches over it ever so carefully, all the same.

Strange that the God of the universe chooses such small and unassuming things to be his most cherished treasures.

…. or maybe i’m just reading too much into this, and seeing something that isn’t there to make my boring life seem more importnat. Who knows.

Eddie Lee and I thought it would be neat to read through the bible this summer. It was actually his idea, and at first i obliged, but truth be told, i obliged somewhat begrudgingly. I did so, just b/c it seemed like the right thing to do, and not in a: feed this hungry child or he will die soon, kind of way; but more in a, I ought to eat my vegetables even though it makes my mouth sad, kind of way. “Aish, this is going to be good for me, so yeah….(sigh), lets do it.” says the brain of daveydave…

But, i’ve been having bad weeks lately, and for a lot of reasons, i’ve been feeling somewhat down and sad these days. And wouldn’t you know it, the few hours and minutes leading to this point, have been somewhat exciting and christmas like. I truly AM excited to read through the bible this summer. I think if i get through it. It will be cool. hah! I think it’s b/c i tend to go through these fads/phases in my life. In january, i bought an electric guitar that I haven’t played in over a month.. My feelings are often fickle, so i’m sure somewhere in the middle of this summer i’ll come full circle and return to that reluctant chore-ish feeling regarding this whole thang, but so be it! i still think some of the best things are accomplished through the dull, mundane tasks in life that are carried out diligently with excellence and care. Unlike my blues guitar, i hope i’m faithful to this challenge.

Again, these are just my thoughts and observations as I attempt to read through the good book this summer.

- daveydave